I learned the truth about the tooth fairy many years ago. At some point I realized that it was physically and even mythically impossible for one fairy to not only know which children had lost teeth on any given night, but to be able to get to all those pillows and trade shiny quarters (or loonies or toonies, depending on the neighborhood) for all those little teeth.
There was only one logical conclusion. There must be hundreds of tooth fairies.
Ours is a dud. She is always on vacation when we need her. I am giving her the benefit of the doubt by saying she is on vacation; it could be that she is just plain lazy or confused or short on cash, or all of the above. Whatever the reason, she’s not very good at what she does and if she has a day job, she definitely should not quit it.
Let’s just say I’ll be glad when that last little pearly white disappears so we can finally be done with tooth fairies for good.
I’m right there with you! (I mean, we have the same tooth fairy in this neck of the woods.)
I have so many times been ready to fire that stupid little fairy as she has (way) more than once forgotten to pick up the goods and deliver the better goods! I have often been able to claim she was on maternity leave, but with time I am finding it hard to cover her tracks with that excuse.
Sadly, our kids know where the Fairy sleeps and are not above waking her at….um….around 4:30 AM…. when they are cold and go to reach for blankets and their sleepy little minds (BING!) remember there is treasure in them thar pillows! But….there…..isn’t??? What??? Yes. It is a harsh letdown and they are nothing if not righteous in their indignation. They march right in to where the Fairy is getting her (much needed, oft neglected) beauty sleep and comfront her with the injustice at hand (tooth?).
She would be fired if it were up to me. And I have suggested that that is indeed the action to take. But my (greedy) children are far more forgiving than I am and always give that washed up old myth another shot.
Lucky, lucky me….uh…Tooth Fairy.